Thursday, November 6, 2014

WEIRD STAR WARS

I'm not going to go into detail about how I was this huge Star Wars geek and then one day I just lost my taste for the stuff. So I haven't paid much attention to the roar of the J.J. Abrams Star Wars machine. Now that they have unveiled a title, which is so underwhelming it will bore me to sleep to even write it here.

So, as I am the worst, laziest kind of blogger, especially here, I was thinking about my favorite stuff from Star Wars. My favorite aesthetic stuff, background stuff, bit characters, because really, that's the stuff that really paints the Star Wars universe for me. One of the issues with the prequels is that being so CG heavy, you no longer had these tiny bits of "weirdness" in the background. It was a whole bunch of noise.

So if I were at the helm of SW7, here are a few things that I would like to see again -

RANCOR KEEPERS
Who is this guy? What is the rancor? Did this guy raise the rancor from birth? I know, I know, there's probably a slew of EU books that tell the whole story, but I've never seen those as "canon" or rather, I've never gotten around to reading those dry, chalky reads. I imagined this guy found the rancor, raised him on his own, trained him, and then found a sweet gig at Jabba's palace where he could keep the rancor fed on those who displeased Jabba. The death or the rancor must have really weighed on the guy. Sucks.

ORIGINAL CANTINA WEREWOLF
They needed monsters, so there you go, a wolfman mask. But really, how this dude is lit in the original 1977 version is really downright creepy and atmospheric. I imagined he was from a planet of werewolves. A planet of werewolves, which I think was an unfinished Hammer production.

Bo'Marr Monk

The B'omarr Order, which consisted of the B'omarr Monks, was a mysterious religious order that moved to the planet Tatooine around 700 BBY. The B'omarr believed that cutting themselves off from all physical sensation would further their studies, and allow them to ponder the galaxy and achieve enlightenment. When a monk became enlightened, his brain was removed through a special procedure, and was placed in a nutrient-filled jar. The brains were held in very high regard by the lower, embodied monks, who saw to their every need, though the brains rarely did anything other than think and wonder. When they did need to travel around their monastery on Tatooine, the brains were transferred into specially modified BT-16 perimeter droids.
That text comes from a Star Wars wiki page, so they know a lot more than me, but it's a spider robot carrying around a brain in a special jar.

Tosche Station
Because after all that build-up, I mean, what the fuck are power converters? Is it something as simple as a part for a sky hopper? Look how blissed out Camie and Fixer are. I'm thinking Tosche Station is something more in line with the Korova Milkbar. 

Mynocks
Great concept. Cool name. "Mynocks...chewing on the power cables." They're probably the most Star Trekky monster to show up in Star Wars.

Random Junk Droids
I always loved those scenes aboard the sandcrawler. These random droids falling over everywhere. Junk, rust, it really made for a mood. Really painted a setting like we hadn't seen before. That dude in the middle is especially cool.